High-functioning yacht disaster.
So I'm unemployed now? Today's schedule:
Oh good, the ad made it to reddit. http://www.reddit.com/r/craigslist/comments/1atlo7/live_in_st_louis_need_a_car_have_i_found_a_deal/
Hi. So, I'm leaving St. Louis at the end of this month. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v27Omsxt8Go
Julie's most recent follower has inspired a fun game where we add "Single :(" to the end of everyone's twitter bio.
BUSINESS TIP: Always include ASCII skull art with your meeting invites.
Winter Storm Q?
BRING ON THE STAR TREK JOKES
God DAMN it, I just want to write the contents of spam emails all day. How do I get this job? #IAmMonster!!
Q: What is the saddest thing?
A: Taylor Lautner's Abs
Whenever I get a shitload of revisions on some dumb, straightforward thing I wrote, I always want to reply with this:
Smacko describes our karaoke destination for this weekend:
Katy Perry wore this to a KIDS' inaugural ball. How many of them started puberty right then and there? #THISisAmerica
"It's not too late for that PERFECT GIFT"
In which I tell Smacko a story about Steve Harvey:
Found on the corner of Olive and Compton. #FREEMASONS
Henceforth, I'm only getting my driving directions through the Golden Corral Trip Planner.
Discount "Skin Tightening" from a place called "The Face Company."
Yeah, man, seems legit.
WHY DO YOU WANT ME TO LIKE VAMPIRE WEEKEND SO MUCH, @SPOTIFY
THEY'RE JUST OK
I woke up at 5:30am and drafted a half dozen tweets w/ my qualms about the Harry Potter series. Enjoy?
@realsmacko Um, I made this for you, I guess?
Amazon is no friend to the autistic community, all tricking them into buying fog juice and zebra mouse pads.
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