Sports Writer at @independent and @theipaper. In Pretoria for #Oscartrial. One time Olympics Correspondent. Essex Boy and still vaguely proud of it.
Very gracious twittering from south west trains, but you've got to hope the problem's been solved in the 11 hour gap
Picture quiz: how many Chelsea filth can you spot?
Are there plans for regulation of newspaper readers? On grounds that someone, somewhere, may buy this:
@TerenceBlacker check out what i had to face on mumsnet, where there's now a whole forum about me...
Mail on Lou Reed more boring than nasty. This funny though. An accountant's son, with a leather jacket!Oh, the shame.
Weirdest thing you've ever seen in a pub?
Nice to see the @hackneygazette looking on the bright side of life.
Lady Gaga, now a canary. Next time, please, just waterski down the red carpet dressed as a shark jumping over Fonzie
Just to let you know @geronimopubs, you can't influence something's DNA. Just 1 example of gold medal twatspeak here
@johnnyquinn you've got a lot without a doubt. But I'm thinking 'bout blowing you out, caaas....
Charles Hodges. David Peacock. It's your planet. We just live here
Huge queue for the gents. Ladies deserted. Must be a Chas and Dave gig...
Wow. @owenjones84 has been keeping very quiet about his #xfactor success.
@JohnRentoul "will this be the cash cow that saves the Independent?" asks @mattkmoore:
Congrats to @FrankieTheSats (who grew up down my road) on little baby, which remarkably weighs less than Lampard
@JoshHalliday (it was a joke, never mind)
@archiebland didn't you once claim conflating news story a with news story b wasn't funny & isn't comedy? Exhibit a:
@sportingintel won't happen. I offered to punch Klitschko's lights out for free last week & the prick just laughed
Can confirm @MichPentecost is a great big spine-tingling West End megastar. And still bang tidy, even when green.
Come on then @seetickets you perennially useless shower. I am ready. READY. #glastofest
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