Stephanie Sparer


I'll call back later. If you don't know me, read my book. If you do know me, buy my book but don't read it:

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do you need this app?

Uh. Someone ought to be critiquing some of these dog owners at the dog show.

So here's what is happening at Lux right now.


Aren't you a little short for a storm trooper?

Just let me know if you want me to text you, too.

just do it.

for the record, I have this in my drafts but didn't send it even before this tweet.

let's do this.

I'm considering this.

The saddest iMessage between and me you ever did see.

I have a little more.

I know one dude.

Fucking Rock of Ages. #ROA

what do you want? I'm buying myself this.

I'm watching the one where Daphne gets dumped by Joe.

You're killing me here.

for you, dear sir. I'm happier than I look, but the lady behind me is taking about being Repulican.

Big Edie.

On Going To Parties With People We Can't Really Be Bothered With. Featuring