Congratulations Chris and Aussie WC rugby team. Daily Mail/People stop being silly.

With Big Sam (legend) and @AdeAdepitan (berk). Also pictured "the mystery hand".

I call this one "jet-lag". Yep, I was on a jet.

Giddy London... Is it home of the free or what? Morrissey

LONDON!

Nature is a baffling paradox. Happy Easter.

Delicious food. The governor's the Basil Fawlty of brasseries.

I forced this stubble out this morning to please you. Now release the hostages.

WE DID!

Booky Wook 2 signing #bookywook2

Erotic literature? #bookywook2 - this time it's personal. Tomorrow

The Hindu Bobby Moore. A perfect stag do finale- they think it's all over- Hare Krishna.

Stag do!

Mum. Have moved to the South and made friends with a lovely little couple. Send condoms.

Mum. Me and "chico" my new homey from the joint. I've been joined his "club". Send condoms.

Experts say a bad cat would look like this.

@katyperry I'm hosting my own awards (#RBMA's) you win. See you wednesday (in LA)

Cat in a hat. Oh yes. I am a literalist. And cat obsessed. Like a spinster.

This is my life now. Just me and him. BOOKY WOOK 2.

This is what a bad cat looks like. Watch out for bad cats.