Sometimes I tweet, sometimes I don't.
I saw this matching Mini & trailer earlier today. What kind of person would do that? #BellEnd
@Schofe This was my first tweet. #MyMumMustBeSoProud
BT Sport leaving a lot to the imagination in the synopsis for @damekellyholmes on the @clarebalding show!
@SkyHelpTeam No. I am an IT consultant and know the difference. Here’s what you display…
@SirPatStew I have an Angry Bird too, mine is topping the xmas tree in my office
#Norad’s Santa Tracker shows the big man is over Baghdad and on his way to London #santatracker
Hey @Schofe how about giving @hollywills a chocolate Santa from Lidl?
Old women are trembling with fear after yesterday’s Google/Microsoft clamp down. No more searching for this
@ProfBrianCox This venn diagram might cheer you up...
I’ve been practicing my street talk, but for the life of me I just don’t get this one
Happy Belated Birthday to @SuziPerry - sorry it's late :-)
@stephenfry I need your help to find this eBay auction with it’s epic photo #FAIL
@serafinowicz Siri #FAIL (thank God)
For those of you who aren't Pay Wall impaired check out the very funny "Jeremy Clarkson: My Week" in The Times
Top tip for Morrisons - remove the poo from the Rump of Beef before cooking it
Excited to have just received my copy of @themanwhofell new book :)
Artist Paul Nobel has been influenced by @serafinowicz 's critically acclaimed 2010 piece "Turd Race"
I wonder if this letter from Sky TV is legally binding? #FreeTV
Yes! Just got my very own iPhone spell check #FAIL
Look at the goodies that Karl Pilkington's agent sent me :-)
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