Jordan Valinsky

@jordan327

writer for @betabeat / formerly @dailydot / The opinions expressed in this commentary are solely those of Jordan Valinsky. / email: jvalinsky@observer.com

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so innovative to see ESPN getting in the music industry #SPORTSJOKE

email full of lies and terribleness:

so proud of this gorgeous pic of my bb, in the SF Chronicle!! #gogirl

RUDE

YOU'RE FINE

LEAVE ME ALONE

i think lindsay lohan accidentally retweeted me?

omg ded butttt :(

i think means "love" in this chat

state of the internet, 2012:

you'll enjoy this

yes! what a sad life i have

when t-swift says she's announcing 'cool news' on monday, she's referencing that she finally finished her Lost marathon

New glasses! They're kinda big but anything that helps hide my face is a good thing.

you reckon incorrectly

14 Totally Normal Facebook Comments You'll Find on Ricki Lake's New Social Network

oh is just contributing to my downfall of a productive human being

yes, my friends are good blowers look

rly excited for the olympics

my arm is cramping, this feels good