This is one satisfied pussy.

The movie you've been dying to see (unless you've already illegally downloaded it) is in select theatres this Friday!

So, this is happening.

Have you picked up your @treatsmagazine yet???

It's official. I'm a resident of LA.

This may be the equivalent to a mother nursing a 5 year old. Bottoms up!

Thanks all of you for my sweet and salty birthday wishes! Moon pies for you!

A good night indeed.

Pillows are for pussies. Pass me my block bitch.

Well, this isn't creepy.

I mean, who DIDN'T wear this outfit along with porn hair back in 1998?! #thanksmom

Happy Saturday! #creepin

I have no clue who this Japanese girl is, but I follow her on instagram and am obsessed. #notcreepy

When in waiting room with fellow actors for hours, I begin the 'I'm a crazy bitch' stare down.

Guessing I should stop watering??

Don't be silly, of course I have my own chauffeur.

Made the bed only to find someone unmaking it.

Everyone has their own form of fourplay...

What could possibly be worse than driving behind the guy on a bicycle that thinks he's a car? More of them.

In order to defend myself from the dog park crazies, I brought along my own Michael J. Fox. No one be messin' with Teen Wolf.