Calista Flockshart


stand up, comedy writing, an all around awful person

Photos and Videos by @camdawson

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yellow diamondz in the light

my wine glass and I look at things differently.

Sexy, 20-something Amish princess with a tight puss:

What's wrong with this picture? Oh yeah, left his dildo in the shower.

What's wrong with this picture? Oh yeah, left his foldout in the shower.

look what you missed!


someone wrote this in my school planner and I have a feeling it was or . Hamm..

Hey, look! It's probably one of the funniest people I know: (sauri)

  • 1812 days ago via site
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Having a twitter celebrity moment. If you <3 the 80's then you know why...

  • 1820 days ago via site
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i've never looked more coherent

  • 1831 days ago via site
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good night! PS: do you love my sexy lighting?

  • 1831 days ago via site
  • 48

Downtown living

This is a diagram of what it would look like if I masturbated

<3 (you really wanna see this)


Bought this super colon cleanse at the natural market. Hopefully it will help me shit out that 80 lbs I wanna lose.


This is how I choose to live.

At least the courtroom is pretty.

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