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You wash your screen out with soap, QuizUp! Potty mouth!
There's that beautiful California weather I flew out here for.
I think the Spurs franchise is prob making enough money to pay for a transportation upgrade. It might be time, guys.
Thanks for the drink coupons, @SouthwestAir ! They're just in time for my flight in a few weeks! You guys rock.
Yow. Cowboy got his hand stuck in the ropes on the bull. He's fine.
Utter tragedy. #cheese... Well, "cheese"
New icon set, new wallpaper. It's like a whole new phone! Yay #android! (yeah, it's been a busy night)
Who threw Dippin Dots all over my yard!?
Caution : dance party!
It's a bad week to be Hercules.
My horoscope writer must be having an off day today. Virgo = mittens v gloves. Wtf.
And then somehow I'm playing bingo at a bar.
A freakin' winter wonderland.
The jerky office fridge froze my celery and carrots. Now I'm hungry AND angry.
Happy birthday, Elvis. You were a fine chap. #MajesticEmpire #HardRockSA @yelpsanantonio
@Rudedogtx high five!
It's going back.
My brother's gift classification system.
This shower curtain is staring into my soul, questioning my entire being.
I'm only eating it for dinner because it's healthy.
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