Native of the Peoples Republic of South Yorkshire. Saucy and a bit sweary. I work in a library...don't let that put you off

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It's grim up North #propergrim

It's okay. Relax. They saw it #bomberstress over

I appear to have a small hole in my Primark lounge wear. No one will notice will they ?

*bins lounge wear *

just for you kiddo .....leek, bacon and potato. Looks like wallpaper paste, but surprisingly tasty :)

I've gone for a messy up do. Even by my standards it's messy. Can't see this lasting the night .... *tosses*

Oh ....she just said it might be chard ? Can anyone confirm. Pak choi or chard ?

mwah ! Xx

River Don burst it's banks at Old Denaby - no more rain please ! Thanks muchly

Although you will see I have added a waistcoat for the purposes of modesty ...... #fail

See through - maybe today is the day to ask for some favours !

Today's Kinder Surprise .... A 'street' hippo *does gang hands*

Super ! #kinderqueen

I just had to look up 'spocking'
Someone does not know their sci-fi ......

I got one off my mate the other day saying the Champion the Wonder Horse was a 'mighty cunt '

knobs !

One can only assume she didn't read the instructions properly - there should be no cringing or catching !

I'm in the roof space. Might hide here.

Actually it's a good place for an illicit bonk, if you don't mind #dustyparts

Russell Brand looks bonkers on The Metro today.

Class As ? Never did me any harm .....

Today's Groupon - yes, hoovers always make me want to sprawl suggestively on the shagpile or frolic with Mr B :/