Swimsuit model, ordained minister, breeder. Able to fold a fitted sheet. Has webbed toes. Eats sarcasm for breakfast. @SmutBookClub peddler.

Photos and Videos by @alotofnothing

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Looks like ideal weather for a splash park birthday party.

Making a getaway. Don't let their innocent smiles fool you.

I received a +K in Opening Boxes from Sharpie! It's only slightly better than 's +K in White People.

Where in the world?

I could lie and say I'm looking at my boobs, but instead

Ride with Zapata

Free limo to the airport? Don't mind if I do, thanks to . #blogher11

Holy swag, Batman! #blogher11

Cheering on as a #knorr4! She will WIN. #blogher11

I fell asleep with on a #tempurpedic at #blogher11 (Please disregard my butt.)

I met the #brawnyman!

This is what looks like when she reads 's pads vs. waterparks post.

Seriously geeking out at Hot Wheels #walltracks with #blogher11

Ready for the #CleverRockStar party! Awww yeah... #BlogHer11

The highly random mix of me, , , , & having beers on the bay. #BlogHer11

Thank GOT this flight has DirecTV because I'm sitting next to a man with a blankie.

#NKOTBSB2M? Oh hell yes, it's BOYS II MEN!

I'll be loving forrrevveerrrr... *sung in falsetto* #NKOTBSB

I swear the teacher from Glee is down there singing. #NKOTBSB