What it do?
Welp, gang. It's all downhill from here. Everything else is just gravy. #ChrimethTihe #ILoveMyWife
@kroach AND YE SHALL RECEIVE! #CrappyChristmasTieAndSweaterMonth #ChrimethTihe
Feel free to disagree with me. #NittanyDiddlers
Buckle up for some awesome. Like you even had the choice. #GoColts
Can you spot the crime against humanity on nfl.com's homepage? #EyeVomit
Also cool. Search "Three Dollar Bill Comedy" in iTunes if you're so inclined (read: If you're not JP Benitez). #SW
This is happening, friends. It can't be stopped. #AndOnlyTheFutureWillJudge
The last thing dumb motherfuckers see when they run their mouths.
Your Sunday morning dose of Holy Shit:
My pallet's got a way to go to discern subtle differences, but practice never hurts. #FRUITYBOOZY
#5 "Blood Orange Sorbet w Coconut Tuile & Allspice Honey"
Looks amazing. Tastes okay. The honey made it globular.
#4 "Stripped Beets w Green Pesto, Grilled Cactus Pear, and Host Cashews"
Can you smell garlic from here? PESTO!
#3 "Baby Artichoke 'Cheetos' w Truffle Creme Fraiche"
Trust me: YOU WISHED YOU HAD THIS IN YOUR FACE! Oh gaaaaaah!
#2 "Green Apple Gazpacho"
Don't about you but I'm a texture guy. And I don't like food that feels like baby vomit.
Course #1 "Chinese Carmel Corn"
Carmel, Ginger, Peppers, and Popcorn. I could have eaten this by the feedbag.
Uh-oh. Look what the dumbass grocer put on sale... #AdvantageJeff #RemoveCeilin
UFD #12: Laura's Vegetarian Chili. My go-to "comfy sweatshirt" meal. Underneath is a layer of ditalini pasta. #Mmm
UFD #11: Apex of processed pastries:Vanilla Zingers. Brains only process 3% of its perfection, imagine what awaits
UFD #10: When God drinks beer, he orders this. #MyLagerFucksYourLagersGirlfriend #AndYourLagerSmilesWhileHeDoesIt
UFD #9: Here's a new one on JP. 's called, "Kwayzo" or something. Not sure what's in it, but it's probably sweet.
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