Large, tired, ageing biped.
Many of my Tweets are my own jokes or puns and should be taken as such, Your Honour...
@_youhadonejob @savs66 I'm sure I'm not the first, but...
@almurray :) #cyclists
@tommyigoe @hudsonmusic :D
@SnapfishUK Can't log in; can you help? :)
@bbc5live @2Quid41Sausage @BBCSport @BBCRedButton Yes. No. I don't know!!
@usasoccerguy my town's athletics club - #threelinesonashirt :) #TonbridgeAC
@simonsimple I was saving up to go to America myself in September but I think you need it more than me now...
Mega-crane arrives at Bewley's Weir, #tonbridge
@4DC5 SSR #fanboy ;)
@JemGodfrey £19.99 reduced from £26.99 from my local Woolworths shop :)
So, who DID pocket the #oscars pizza delivery guy's tips..? @theellenshow
This was posted on the FT316 FB group by Phil Hope :D
@MattBloomFilms This gets my seal of approval :)
Too soon for a superb owl pic? #nfl
@hildweather All clear atm; water about 3-3.5ft below nearest wall...
@simonsimple I say, did someone say "fillies"?
Which first; Jack Daniel's fudge or Guinness chocolate caramel... #firstworldproblems
Spam's ON!! @EricIdle
@tontweet @kmfmofficial Lunchtime yesterday; normal-looking High St gridlock...
@PlanetFrost 1. See pic 2. May I make a backup copy of the DVD, please?
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