I love my celeb pals, I'm happy to be a confidant or a shoulder to cry on! Then it's off to The Sun or Heat! Ker-ching! Winner of Golden Twits 2011
Sharon Osbourne has finally quit as world's most ironic judge of 'America's Got Talent' but she still looks amazing!
Er.... what the fuck?!!
NASA probe #Curiosity send back incredible photo of the surface of Mars
Actually I have the exclusive photo!! RT @davidwalliams: introducing Simon Cowell's new girlfriend to the world...
Things had gone rapidly down hill for The Masters of the Universe since being defeated by Skeletor!
At #TeamGB Women's basketball, as you can see enormous interest from the press box... #London2012
Mmm.... #Olympic nipple slip #London2012
Fashion-weirdo Karl Lagerfeld says Pippa Middleton is "ugl"y? Just a reminder, this is Karl...
@HylandIan @TVKev @danwootton I saw "Comedy" Dave on Oxford Street this morning :-(
Chinese diver really squeezes out a little extra!! #London2012
I didn't realise Boris was fighting for access to his kids?! #London2012
China’s Ye Shiwen ‘is clean,’ say #Olympics drug testers! Not sure about her coach though!
Mitt Romney completes his 'Good Will Tour' by slating Russia!
Tom Daley leading in the Pike Dive! To save confusion, here's an explanation...
He's a quick break down of non-#Olympic UK news! #London2012
Dude, where's my crowd? #London2012
Where was that fucking border controller strike when we needed it?! #London2012
Serbia swears in new government...
Asda are getting on the bandwagon to produce this handy book tie-in tissue for... mopping up after #50shadesofgrey
Egypt's Olympic #London2012 team have been given fake Nike gear! They had their suspicions when the trainers arrived!
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