Professional Tube Driver. Amateur ninja. Also, insane idiot savant.
I do believe the cat has a pink carpet.
There’s a large footprint on the windscreen of my train. On the *outside*. #AlrightyThen @tube_boob
Just asked the girl at the hairdresser for a full Brazilian wax. The look on her face was pure gold.
Sofa shopping. This one is ridiculously comfortable. I may be here for some time.
98-stop shift today. Nice. Time to go and prep my train; make sure those brakes are working.
I can see my train from here.
Here’s a pic of #JenniferLawrence that should be shared.
Got me some nutritious snacks from the pet shop.
What’s this? Oreo chocolate? Oh, go on then; if I must.
I don’t believe it! How can a journalist not know the difference between your and you’re?
@TescoBorehamWd About time!
Just saw Samantha Womack in @marksandspencer. That practically makes me famous.
So a friend is teasing me with this pic of Hawaiian-style doughnuts. I actually hate her now. Bitch.
Bored of the standard phonetic alphabet we have to use at work. Might start using this one from now on. @tube_boob
So how do they expect me to cross this footbridge now? @tube_boob
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