Anything I write on twitter is stupid and brilliant.
Oh, my book INSTANT MOM: http://t.co/ZtfzUknq
@YO_RANDYJACKSON ...WHAT did u just say to me?!
My fave autograph ever. I'm Tim's secret lover.
Laura Ziskin explains telethon! #standup2cancer
@mrskutcher Happy Labor Day, from your guest bathroom!
Oh. RT: @elder1213 that's a lie..the queen does no shake hands
Ian accidentally got a vegan protein cookie.
my high school nerd pic for u @gabrielleoxo
LA: found dog. If yours, tweet description. Soon...cuz I love his chili-farts.
Reading fanmail...anyone want to translate this one?
@ friend's house to watch Shark Week. My dog's into it.
Ghouls on beach today:
Such fresh air..hey how about Beach Scented Gum?
On beach today: message from the universe
Ah, LA...the sun shines, everyone's so nice!
"Larry Crowne" street scene lighting, or my new boob job?
@TomHanks + @RitaWilson + me lovin' "Larry Crowne"
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