Writer for http://t.co/rsfWkfFmJn. Semi-retired model. I love Seinfeld. All opinions my own.
My mirror shattered into the shape of Michigan’s upper peninsula. Coincidence? Or True Detective season 2 plot?
This is all you need to know about @curtislepore:
The Hollywood sign looks weird today…
.@blakegriffin32 #ThisCouldBeUsButYouPlayin (thanks for the photo Mr. Ghostface)
I think this girl on The Bachelor has the twitter bird tattooed on her side.
So, @MrJerryOC is doing #IAmSorryToo next to Shia LaBeouf’s #iamsorry. This is @JensenClan88 with a bag on his head.
I’m at a wrestling match, guys. It’s incredible. @OfficialPWG
Here's the rest of my @23andMe DNA. My great-grandfather was a Nazi. This is pretty surprising.
Dead body gone, back to partying @VirginAmerica!
Fire department and LAPD are "cleaning up." Yeah, cleaning up DEATH.
"We'll get this* taken care of but we should still have an on-time arrival." *dead body.
I won the lottery again?!? What are the odds!!???
Still not convinced they're making an Anchorman 2 even though @funnyordie sent me these Ron Burgundy scotch glasses.
Guy sitting next to me on this flight won't stop breathing and resting his head on my leg. Ugh.
Got a pic of the meteor over LA! So beautiful.
@bdetrick Ditch that dream theory. Todd is still alive!!!!
Whoa, I found another performance art piece from the Buzzfeed @Horse_ebooks creator!
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