retired infant. self proclaimed human, oxygen breather, wallet owner, frequent sleeper and former virgin.
I come home from work and I see a bunch of chickens running around in my neighbor's yard.
My St. Patrick's Day shirt.
@heyfreshy I got a tank that lights up
I'm wearing Oscar during the Oscar's. #ERedCarpet
It's good to know that CVS is selling headless Easter Bunnies, I can never find them when I want one.
I'm ready for the #AllStarGame #TeamEast
I'm such a grouch today.
Who is L.L. Cool J?
The clue was "how do you win Twitter? "
I think I'm going to wear this every Tuesday from now on. #TupacTuesday
Look what the Simpsons tweeted right after me.
I don't know how this happened, but this is the best thing I've ever seen on Facebook.
First pizza of 2014
He's not very happy
This a bad sign.
Do you guys like my hat?
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