Jenny Johnson

@JennyJohnsonHi5

Writer, proud Texan, asshole and owner of 2 dogs. Follow me on Instagram: jennyjohnsonhi5

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I'm not sure Selena Gomez will ever get over this stud. #SideBoob

I'm casting my vote for... RT : We're counting down to the reveal of this year's Sexiest Man Alive.

Well, Arian is awesome and we follow each other on Twitter, so Brady can suck it. #GoTexans

So funny! Reminds me of when I wrote it.

Crushing it at the Texans game with Mrs. Bun B and #GoTexans #BullsOnParade

Workin my J. Johnson 5 jersey. #Beer #GoTexans #CallMyMomToComePickMeUp

Today is my basset hound's birthday. #HappyBirthdayBirdy

Cute? RT : Kisses

#FranksFight You bet!

I'm really disappointed in Verizon's customer service. They better learn to "handle my replies."

The rest of my week is guaranteed to suck. Thank you, #Flattered #HolyShit

The rest of my week is guaranteed to suck. Thank you, #Flattered #HolyShit

The "Taken" guys at the end of the bar sent me a shot of Patron. I'm gonna die tonight, right?

HOLY SHIT!!!! CARMAGEDDON!!!! SAVE YOURSELVES!!!!

I'm not getting money from this, but I can honestly say I fucking LOVE Best iPhone app ever. Uber driver, Anna.

It's fun to imagine Chris Brown is Robin Ventura in this picture

I'll bring Birdy if I can be in your club too. Birdy is ready --->

Kris Jenner, Kim, Kourtney and Khloe should totally be jealous of Honey Boo Boo's family. #BonerCity

I have a daughter named Birdy too!

Shit is getting crazy! One of these chicks is so gonna get pregnant tonight. #DNC