Writer, proud Texan, asshole and owner of 2 dogs.
Follow me on Instagram: jennyjohnsonhi5
@kimg5577 Your boss better pay up!!!
Houston will sure miss you @ConnorBarwin98 best of luck to you in Philly. #BullsOnParade #ClassAct
Remember the scene in 'Ferris Bueller's Day Off' when Principal Rooney thinks he sees Ferris, but it's a chick? Well..
Just hanging with @bazecraze @LaurenSivan and @perlapell at Saturday Night Live. #ShittingMyPants
I try and live everyday just like this. #DoinIt
Flight to Amsterdam: €9,000
8 Heineken: €22
Photo w/ a hooker in the Red Light District: Priceless (and €20)
@Tamara_Mello @mslesliebibb Drinkin under red lights y'all! #Amsterdam #Whores
My Madonna t-shirt will be up for auction tonight at 6:00pm EST to help @sucittaM 's wife. RT!!! http://www.charityauctionorganizer.com/Az/1cb9f9bf-0eb5-43d1-bb10-06a3bfc56d62/OnlineCatalog
#Sequester @JordanPeele @KeeganMKey
Happy Birthday, Michael Jordan!!! I'm sure me caddying for you when I was 15 is still the highlight of your career.
I just got swerved :(
Jack White looks like he raided Porter Wagoner's closet. #Grammys
Me n' Bibb are gettin' tipsy at @WhiteHorseATX @mslesliebibb
Download the @DecentlyFunny podcast with me @DannyZuker @jennyandteets and Cock Jenny's hot dad. http://t.co/gzp5a6mU
Tomorrow you can download the @DecentlyFunny podcast with @jennyandteets @DannyZuker and me. #DoinItOnAPodcastYall
Chopsticks n' shit #DoinIt RT @JennaElfman: Eatin' dinner with this bitch @jennyjohnsonhi5 http://t.co/NfSAanQd
Hey @HeatherMcDonald When I finish your book, can I get a "Book It" sticker? I want a free Personal Pan Pizza. #BookIt
@richardmarx Two more songs then I gotta go to sleep
The sexual tension in this picture is explosive. #PaulaDeen #Butter #Sons #Diabeetus #DoinIt #TouchinFaces #Ham
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