Jenny Johnson

@JennyJohnsonHi5

Writer, proud Texan, asshole and owner of 2 dogs. Follow me on Instagram: jennyjohnsonhi5

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Your boss better pay up!!!

Houston will sure miss you best of luck to you in Philly. #BullsOnParade #ClassAct

Remember the scene in 'Ferris Bueller's Day Off' when Principal Rooney thinks he sees Ferris, but it's a chick? Well..

Just hanging with and at Saturday Night Live. #ShittingMyPants

I try and live everyday just like this. #DoinIt

Flight to Amsterdam: €9,000
8 Heineken: €22
Photo w/ a hooker in the Red Light District: Priceless (and €20)

Drinkin under red lights y'all! #Amsterdam #Whores

My Madonna t-shirt will be up for auction tonight at 6:00pm EST to help 's wife. RT!!! http://www.charityauctionorganizer.com/Az/1cb9f9bf-0eb5-43d1-bb10-06a3bfc56d62/OnlineCatalog

#Sequester

Happy Birthday, Michael Jordan!!! I'm sure me caddying for you when I was 15 is still the highlight of your career.

I just got swerved :(

Jack White looks like he raided Porter Wagoner's closet. #Grammys

Me n' Bibb are gettin' tipsy at

Download the podcast with me and Cock Jenny's hot dad. http://t.co/gzp5a6mU

Tomorrow you can download the podcast with and me. #DoinItOnAPodcastYall

Chopsticks n' shit #DoinIt RT : Eatin' dinner with this bitch http://t.co/NfSAanQd

Hey When I finish your book, can I get a "Book It" sticker? I want a free Personal Pan Pizza. #BookIt

Two more songs then I gotta go to sleep

The sexual tension in this picture is explosive. #PaulaDeen #Butter #Sons #Diabeetus #DoinIt #TouchinFaces #Ham