I'm the funniest person my kids know.
For a good time, call (650) 937-9442.
Christmas tree goes here please.
Because adding sugar to smashed tomatoes is just like getting shot at.
We were visiting @runningthezoo yesterday. Her daughters adopted me, and she gave us cookies.
We were visiting @runningthezoo yesterday and she made
Iced tea. Fish and chips. Santa Barbara. Sunset.
Big Trouble In Little China gang sign! #LNTMD
I had to scrape frost off my windshield this morning. What the hell, California?
McDonald's serves up old-fashioned gender norms with its old-fashioned burgers.
Leafy Sea Dragon -- Monterey Bay Aquarium
Erin and I are on a daddy-daughter sushi date.
The Sacramento Children's Museum is a compressed version of the first floor of the San Jose CDM.
It's all nature-y 'n' stuff here.
Apple Hill looks like a fair today.
Hanging with my cool uncle. (He in no way made me take this picture and send it to Twitter. Help.)
I stole a baby.
Uncle Shopkeep Alexei stealing Erin's headphones and commandeering Phineas and Ferb.
Uncle Shopkeep Alexei has tried to build a charcoal fire, but they don't teach grilling in London.
Now @fiatluxsf is violating like nine child-labour laws.
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