My cars name is Waldo because sometime I lose him in the crowd
Who says walking to the bank can't be a horrifying experience? #ewewew #spider #ewewew
Body armor and fairy wings. Just common items in the backseat of @KJmcAWESOME's car #smitten
Aaaaand is that a panty liner? At a park? I don't have the heart to add a cute instagram filter. Its too sad.
Lobby note deployed #occupyshelving
Oh hell no. Leave a bitchy note on a car amidst an empty lot, your ass is explaining it to me. Dare you to call
I giggle every day when my lotion makes the farty noise. But then I realize its this and I feel old again
And @KJmcAWESOME just brought me these even though I woke up in the middle of the night and refused to stop talking #aw
Champs w/ sorbet is an actual desert menu item @bin38. I blame my crippling headache on this #undeservedbutdoinit
In a womens restroom stall. Golf claps ladies of #SF #ballz #SFgiants
I left @KJmcAWESOME to set up our new bathroom space heater. Love you darling but this is like, a LOT of fire hazards
I got THE MOST excited about 1) reunited w/ hot pink water bottle 2) finding xtra large jello shot hidden in my fridge
I love where I live. A fleet of go-cars as mario kart complete with music #dying
Adulthood: Being excited to organize a closet and also having all ingredients for a bloody mary from scratch
I'm going to a cowboy cocktail party. These are clothes I happened to have. Feel free to judge
I think I need new wipers #neardeathexperience
Apparently when you leave silicon valley, transporting bicycles is equal to having a giant asshole painted on your car
I have a hard time believing "Marketplace" is that interesting
Blank canvas, paint, paper, wine, jello shots, music #furiouslyhappy
I keep waiting for him to turn into an autobot but I guess he's shy #bumblebee
I love getting hand addressed letters in shakey old man cursive. Its like a red flag for "contents are bizarre"
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